Descent into Madness

As I have discussed other places, I have (or used to have) what I call my "Hours of Brilliance"--the point in the day when I am my most creative, my most productive. At the point when I identified them, these hours were usually around 1 or 2 AM--past the point of no return, as far as sleep and exhaustion goes. I found that in these wee hours of the morning, I could truly release into my creative flow.

I think things have changed.

Today I nearly drove Dixy crazy with my own madness. I was edgy and antsy all day long, never spending more than twenty minutes doing one thing. I would jump from reading to writing to a movie to talking to playing the piano back to reading to talking to writing...always back to writing--but never getting anywhere.

I'm working on the plot for a novel right now, a novel that I can't seem to work myself around. The main characters are well fleshed out in my mind, as is the eventual destination--I just can't seem to develop the intervening storyline. It's driving me mad.

Usually when I write, I just sit down and write. I've only rarely plotted a story or novel in advance, and even then I've only sketched things out, never going into great detail. This book is different, however, and I've determined that it must be. I'm trying to create something much more complex than I've ever written before, and its proving much more challenging than I anticipated. I just have to wonder whether I'm helping or hurting my creative processes, because pacing my house for hours on end seems a little unsettled to me.

The Muse is trying, I'm sure, to communicate with me. I just wish I could hear her properly!